Friday, September 22, 2006

who's cool now

Speaking at a victory rally in south Beirut in his first public appearance since the war with Israel, Hezbollah leader Sheikh Hassan Nasrallah said his group still had over 20,000 rockets available.

Nasrallah joined hundreds of thousands of Hezbollah supporters who filled the devastated southern suburbs of Beirut on Friday with a sea of yellow flags to celebrate "divine victory" in their month-long war against Israel.

The Sheikh declined to give further details, citing a three-way media deal involving Time Warner, Sirius Satellite Radio, and CBS's Katie Couric.

"I would like to -- I am 'launching' on the 25th, and I am honor-bound to Mel, Dick and Katie not to comment on the story before that day," he said.

The assembled crowd, which Hezbollah's Al-Manar television said was in the hundreds of thousands, was swollen by Amal supporters waving the green flags of the sometime rival but more recently allied movement.

From L.A. where he was also holding a rally, US President George W. Bush, shirtless, called Nasrallah a "piece of cod." Sporting a half-face tat and slurring his words, Bush recited recent recruiting efforts by the State Dept. involving Latin American gangs.

"We've got Mara Salvatrucha, Mara 18 -- you wouldn't believe how much live ammunition those boys carry," said the President, adding, "bring it on. These fellas make their own rockets, and know what to do with 'em. We got pachucos that make Hezbollah look like Judy Garland before she hit the skids."

Burgeoning support for the President among brazen people of color is not new. Last November, former crack dealer 50 Cent expressed great admiration for the Republican leader.

"(The president) is incredible... A gangsta. I wanna meet George Bush, just shake his hand and tell him how much of me I see in him."


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